52 Comments

Oh, the twist at the end and the last line!

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It must be so terrible to have been reduced to living only for revenge. Thank you!

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Beautiful. Unsettling. Really well done.

Looking forward to reading more...

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Thank you!

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Beautifully unfolded!

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Thank you!

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Am writing about some of the first augurs of ancient Greece at the moment, so reading this was timely. A wonderful story, beautifully told! Really enjoyed it. :-)

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Thank you! I’m pleased you like this. Have you posted any of you Greek work? I’d like to read it.

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Working on something at the moment :-) have been gathering ideas for some time but haven’t managed to get them in a readable form yet. Hopefully this time! :-)

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I hope you do. I got the bit between my teeth a couple of years ago, writing the ‘real’ story of Pasiphaë. I finished it last year. There’s a publisher been sitting on it for 14 months now, still undecided.

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Wow - fascinating! That I would love to read :-) I'm looking at poetry's connection to prophecy and specifically the founding of the oracle of Delphi, and the line of seers going back to Gaia, the primordial poet/prophet. It's been a bit of an obsession for a few years - more in a creative essay format than fiction, but I think there's something interesting in it :-)

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Your idea seems much more literary than mine, which is an attempt to set the record straight. Crete was a matriarchy not an outpost of Athens, and when the Greeks finally stamped out the old culture, they added their own stories (Theseus, Minotaurs, abnormal female lusts etc etc) to discredit it. I like your idea of going back beyond Delphi, right to the beginning. The tribes before the Mycenaeans were very probably matriarchal too.

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Ah, it's just some weird ideas I had haha. Love your setting of the record straight! Totally agree, yes yes! The whole line of prophets from Delphi are women, and they were, in my opinion, the holders of the deepest knowledge in that area, like Dodona, and leaders (more than likely drawing on and adding to the knowledge passed on by Egyptian priestesses) - I have a theory that the Apollo myth being installed at Delphi and him being made into the "leader" of the Muses was part of the patriarchal take-over, and stories from that point were re-written to be male-centred, and so part of what I'm trying to do is similar, in terms of setting the record straight - trying to tell the stories with women back at the centre (and as the inventors of poetry, among other things) :-) Lovely to meet you, and learn of your project, and the cross-overs in our interests! Very cool.

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i think it can help if you tag it with what sort of writing it is it will show up in more searches or against peoples prefeeences. I think. might be wrong...welcome aboard anyway!

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Thanks! I’m a bit slap-dash about tagging and explanations. I’ll try to be more explicit with the next piece, which I’ll post when I’ve replied to all these notes!

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Nice work!

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Thank you :)

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That was a killer blow. I didn't spot the father possibility.

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I wonder if it’s a gender thing. Women readers tend to get that it must be the father. Make of that what you will!

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That is an interesting observation. Although, if you have more women readers, then it might be a consequence of bias from absolute vs. relative numbers.

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Of course. The danger of making generalities out of a couple of examples.

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Chilling, even though I guessed it was her Father. Lovely turn of phrase as always.

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Thanks, Debbie. I’d never make a detective story writer :)

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There are plenty enough of those! Do what you do. No one else can!

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There are, and a nice little earner that niche is too. Ah well, we do what we can, don’t we?

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Yes! Shame there is no money in poetry, eh? Although that’s maybe a whole other discussion.

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If there was, I know the kind of people who would be making it, and I'm not one of them :)

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🙂👍🏻

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"cupid smile" - such nuance, a twist on love turned avarice ~

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I just can't imagine how it feels to know your father only cares about how much he can sell you for.

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Even though I suspected it was her father, it was still a scary story with elements of truth.

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Thank you. All that temple stuff, oracles, Vestal Virgins etc it was all tidied up enforced prostitution. I bet she hated her father.

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How could she not?!

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Great to see you here. I followed and will recommend your amazing poetry and writing, Jane. ~Colleen~

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Thank you! I don’t know where the posts go once they’re published. I’ll just have to keep tinkering with this site.

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I set Sunflower Tanka up like a blog. If you do that you will have a dashboard and area where you see your previous posts. I had to play with it too.

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When I post a second story, I’ll check that feature :)

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Well... you took the leap, I'm delighted to see you here, and what a way to open up your Substack! So glad she got her revenge, he had it coming.

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Yes, I leapt. No idea how this place works yet, but I’m trying. Ha ha! Shame about the little lad though. I’ve got loads of short stories I can post here, but I’d like to find other writers who write on similar lines. Advice is to post these notes and start conversations, but I’m not here for the craic, I just want to find the people who’ll read my stories.

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As for the little lad, he'd only have grown up like his father, so small mercies, I'd say!

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That, of course, is true. Are you another one who doesn’t swallow the myth that children are all angels? All those monsters of adults were kids once. Bet they were awful then too.

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You'll soon figure it all out. You can follow Unstack Substack to learn more, I find her really good. There's another one as well that my menopausal brain fog won't let me remember, I'll get the link for you.

Yes, it's all about the readers and finding your 'tribe' so to speak, they are here, and they'll find you soon enough. I'll go onto mine and make a recommendation, too... they're a great way of getting followers, I got 2 from you already! 😂 So thank you! I hope I can return the favour and send some readers your way, too.

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If I have the energy! It’s almost my bedtime already and I haven’t done anything this evening except chat!

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